SPOOL was three years old and had already gotten great press, even winning the highly coveted Quilt Sampler Top 10 Shop of the Year Award given by Better Homes and Gardens. I’m not bragging when I say it was a remarkable store. Things were very bright, with one exception: I had become dreadfully unhappy.
Owning a quilt shop, or any small independent retail business, is amazing amounts of hard work. Working 15-18 hours a day was not unusual and that meant time not spent with family or being able to peruse any personal joys. I had no time off. I actually worked on the day I had major surgery. As the saying goes, “There is no rest for the wicked or those in retail,” and that was true for me.
![](https://craftindustryalliance.org/CIADecember2016/1206_Spool1.jpg)
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Recommended reading
During my time of working on these hard choices I did a lot of reading and recommend these books if you are looking for help in making choices. While they are not all specifically business books they are about the business of life.
The irony is that I love creating a magical retail experience. The look of delight on each customer face when they would walk in our door for the first time, their tiny, happy gasps or the occasional “whoop,” meant we were doing it right. Still it wasn’t enough and I knew I had to make a change for my own wellbeing.
To say closing SPOOL was not a popular decision among fans and customers would be an understatement. Yet in my gut I knew that no matter how big we grew, how much more social media acclaim we received and even how many people drove half way across the United States to visit us, I had made a Big-M, Mistake. (A Big-M Mistake in my book is one that reaches so far and wide as to create ripples past your own door and out into the world). All the success in the world could not make up for being so unhappy on a daily basis.
And offer they did! While some were just quietly weepy to lose a progressive-leaning fabric haven in an otherwise rather traditional area, some were free with their accusations that I had no “right” to close and that as a service business “I owed it to the community to stay open”. And yet their shame was an offering that I was not obligated to accept, much like that seasonal fruitcake that does second duty as a doorstop.
I’m now working daily to build Badass Quilters Society into an income generator that gives me the luxury of maintaining the industry connections I cherish while caring for my family in a way that best fits my desires and values. Each day we’re a day further down our own path and I always reserve the right to start over, again.
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![Maddie Kertay](https://craftindustryalliance.org/CIAmugs/MaddieKertayC.jpg)
Maddie Kertay
contributor
Best wishes, Maddie, as you tackle new new challenges!
You’re awesome to write this. Courageous, to say the least. I own a brick and mortar, and when you own the brick and mortar you miss a lot of what is going on in the world around you. I have managed to make it work because my children are grown, but my family will always come first. Thanks for your brave article.
Bless you, Maddie, for having the courage to know your truth, speak your truth, and to make the decision that was right for you. It’s far too easy to continue to do something that others think we “should” be doing. I celebrate your choice to close out that chapter and to move on with the things that bring you joy.
A powerful message. Thanks so much for your inspiring insight and action!
Thanks for this! My partners and I closed our yarn store last February for similar reasons. Although we were not the roaring success that Spool was we were succeeding in a smaller way, just not enough to justify the enormous time demands. We debated throwing ourselves in even harder but decided that we needed more balance in our lives. Good luck to you!
Such a beautiful piece that captures your struggle and the customer’s grief as well. I think you captured it when you said “magical”, we all want a community gathering place where we feel seen and a sense of wonder.
Maddie:
I love the honesty of your article – no sugar coating, no puffing, and no self pity – just an example to follow!… 🙂 thanks!
A brilliant and honest story! I can relate in so many ways when I closed down my thriving Quilting Classes business 2 years ago for similar reasons. The toughest decision to make, but it has released me into discovering new things! Nothing gets wasted! Wishing you every success and balance for the future! Jxo
Gah….I was at my shop until 1am last night and boy is this resonating this morning.
What an honest an open piece, Maddy. I never expect anything less from you. As I struggle with some of the same issues in my own business, it was so refreshing to read your words. You have such a powerful voice in this industry. From all of us out here struggling in this part of the industry, I humbly thank you. xox
I agree with the wonderful comments above. I wish you all the very best in the future. Great article, very valuable information. Enjoy your new goals.
Maddie, I remember reading your article a year ago when I was in the midst of some similar serious soul searching. At the time, your article was a shining beacon for me. It took me several months to make my way, but I just posted about the change in my profile and I felt called to come back here and comment.
Thank you so much for sharing your story Maddie!
Belinda
Here is what I shared on my profile:
Hmmm…. so after over a year of pondering, what am I doing? I’ve taken the dive and started a web design company!
My creative journey has been taking a slow turn for a while now. In 2014, I began to feel discontent and could not put my finger on it. I thought I was lonely, so I got lovely Lily (aussie doodle) to keep me company. While Lily was a fabulous companion, that discontent continued. I started regularly co-working with friends, an interior designer and photographer, but rather than brainstorming new ideas for my shop, I spent my time helping them tweak their websites. I even made a complete newsletter series and an online reservation form and tracking system for my dog’s breeder. Just for fun!
It was clear I was avoiding my studio. After some introspection, I realized my joy came from hearing stories about my pillows being given and any joy I received from actually making pillows had dissipated quite some time ago.
The truth seemed to be that I loved creatively solving problems for people. People needed a personal gift and the pillows filled that need. People needed their technology to do some of their business’ heavy lifting and creating websites and newsletters filled that need. The difference was that I was better at working with technology than I was with scissors and my sewing machine.
The truth hurts. But the truth will set you free. And it did.
In August 2017, I turned my Etsy shop off to raise a litter of puppies. And when the puppies all went home, I decided not to turn my shop back on.
Instead, I forged ahead slowly, testing the waters, turning web and newsletter design into a business. I took on real paying clients, including a life coach for recent college graduates looking to find “real” jobs and a custom home renovations expert. And it was magical!
Time for a little more honesty here… I was a web analyst back in my corporate days and have years of web technology experience under my belt.
Of course, technology has changed a bit since then and I spent several months filling in the knowledge gaps. My techie background has served me well with the transition into web design, but this journey – 5 years as a creative small business owner – has given me tremendous insight into what my small business owner clients are up against. It has been a priceless nugget of experience in my toolkit.
Do you know what else? The joy of sewing has begun to return and I want it to stay. I plan to continue writing about my creative pursuits on my blog and interacting with fellow creatives on Instagram (@belindaleedesigns). I guess that turns me back into the target market for many of you here – as I’ll be looking for new ways to challenge my creative fancy!
My official web design site is launching in January 2018. (Can you believe I started a business without a website!!)
You can find at https://www.belindaleebriggs.com/ where I specialize in Squarespace web design and Mailchimp Newsletter Design!!!
Kudos to you Maddie for first having the insight to do the work on figuring out what wasn’t working for you, and for then having the courage to pull the plug on what most would consider a successful business.
It’s so easy for those on the outside to see only the end result (a beautiful and well stocked store) and to be focused on their needs and how you fulfill them (by offering them something unique, a place they love to be).
But the task of starting, building and growing a successful business requires absolute dedication and focus, and untold hours of work (and often stress). And there’s no ‘finish line’ – it’s never-ending!
I can only imagine how disappointed your customers were when you decided to close, just as I was when my favorite papercrafting shop closed. And it was likely especially hard for them to understand since the store was a success!
I would imagine that’s where the ‘strong opinions’ originated, from their extreme disappointment. That said, I’m so sorry you didn’t feel more supported in your decision.
What you did took so much courage and I hope you’re happier for having made it.
All the best to you in all you pursue,
Steph
Hey Maddie – it felt like a relief to know someone else was in a similar position as myself. When my husband and I first opened our all-locally-crafted makers shop in Dallas, we knew we were well loved and accepted (at least by the end of a rocky first year.) We did our best and worked our butts off, but ultimately, I ended up feeling the same way you did. I had envisioned being able to continue working with my own craft (jewelry) while I waited for customers to browse or in between events and classes. But every time I got started, I was interrupted by curious customers wanting to hear a story about what I was making and why. I found this sweet at first but it didn’t take long before I wanted to gather my stuff and go home and work in my own space without prying eyes. Plus, the creative process is fickle and doesn’t enjoy being interrupted. The muse will take off if she’s being ignored or told to shut up!
So we did shut that shop after four years – and ANYONE who told me I owed it to the community to stay open? My very quick response was “Great! I wish you luck when you open your own store!” or “Here’s one right here you can take over!” I must say, that felt good even if it was snarky. NOBODY wanted my job – they just didn’t want our shop to go away. Struck me as greedy and self centered – which was on them, not me. I was not a failure. I created a great shop with the help of my husband and my mom. But then I had to take a break.
Now – one more chapter of this journey to tell about. We did reopen the store, 3.5 years later, in a better location. And this time? I am hiring folks to help me. Not just family members this time – folks who enjoy retail and also understand what we’re doing. I feel like the three year lease will be just fine. No panic. But also, I won’t feel badly if we decide to shutter after those three years are up. And I won’t take an ounce of shaming for it.
I wish you all the best. If you’re ever in Dallas, I hope you’ll pay us a visit! Makers Connect at 9047 Garland Road, Dallas TX 75218…near the best lake in town and the Arboretum!
I read this at exactly the right time. We closed our brick & mortar shop last year during the early part of the pandemic and went online only, and we’ve been more successful online thanks to the lower overhead costs.
But I’ve been daydreaming about reopening a physical shop, and your experience reminded me that selling online has been so much easier on my mental health and my family life. Running the brick and mortar shop was hard, and while it was fun, I need more time to spend with my family and on myself.
Thanks for sharing your story!
Hurray for you!! You did the right thing for yourself and your family. If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of others. That could mean family, friends and customers. It sounds like you have the right attitude towards the naysayers and negative comments. Your shop looked beautiful and welcoming. But it was no longer welcoming you. You did the right thing and now you can take a breath and move on with the next thing. Thanks for sharing your story. Best wishes for success in your next venture.